Reading, Writing and Riding with Ajai

**Our classmate Ajai Ragde passed away suddenly at sea on August 2, 2019.**

**Francis X. Nazareth remembers his classmate, friend & writing partner.**

(A special Thank You to Ajai’s family for their cooperation and especially the beautiful photographs. You can leave comments about this article at the end of this page or/and visit his Facebook page: Ajai Ragde to leave your tributes.)

It was April 1977, the last of our teenage years - after our Inter-Science exams at St. Xavier’s College, we knew we were not going to write or ride together again. Ajai would go on to pursue Marine Engineering (DMET) in Calcutta, while I continued with my BSc at St. Xavier’s in Bombay. He had invited me and another classmate to his house at the BPT quarters, on P. D’Mello Road, where I met his parents for the last time. Not surprisingly, his dad was busy reading but was very happy to see us. His mom knew that soon we would be separated from each other and also them from Ajai, but was happy that we made the best of our teenage years. There was a big green balcony that ran along the house and I knew that house meant a lot to all of them. In his email to me a few years ago, Ajai wrote, “Very recently, while driving to South Mumbai over the new Eastern Freeway that runs over the docklands, we passed our old BPT quarters. The building, which was unused for long, and was slowly getting run down, has now been demolished. Just an empty plot with rubble strewn all over. A house with such happy memories, now just ashes to ashes, dust to dust? But Siddhi Vinayak hotel opposite and the landmark Princes Docks clock tower, still stand.”

Nitish Kati, Ajai Ragde, Nitin Dharadhar, Tushar Ruparel & Rajeev Karpe.

The last few years at St. Xavier’s High School, Fort, the four of us classmates, Ajai, Abhay Dandavate, Nitin Dharadhar and myself, all went home together on the B.E.S.T. bus # 45, which we boarded from just opposite our school. I was blessed to have their company on my ride along Crawford Market, Carnac Bunder and the Docks, where trucks, piled with goods, filled the streets. I can still picture the journey, with Abhay and me talking and Nitin and Ajai engrossed in their books with one ear to our conversation and with a usual “Kai Re” or “Nai Re” in Marathi. Ajai had his right thumb between the pages as he held the book and a white handkerchief in his left hand to wipe the sweat and dust from his face. We first passed Ajai’s house and sometimes noticed his mother on the balcony, then Nitin & I were ready to get down at Dockyard Road Station after wishing our goodbyes to Abhay, who carried on to, if I remember clearly, Cotton Green. Nitin lived at the Mazagon Docks complex and I literally lived “on the other side of the tracks”. Nitin and I tried our best to get off the bus at the signals near Rosary Church as the bus stop was far from the junction.

Being one of those rare Catholic boys who could neither sing nor play the guitar, and were not good in any sports but excelled in Mathematics, I was unique by nature. Now, rightly so, I live in McKinney, Texas, whose tag line is “Unique By Nature”. Abhay, now Dr. Dandavate, is a leading orthopedic surgeon in Dubai. Nitin, one of the brightest students in our batch, heads his consulting firm in Mumbai. Back then I had the good fortune to have literally the front row view, sitting on the top deck of the Double Decker, of these three brilliant students, Ajai in particular, as we two continued our Jesuit education at St. Xavier’s College.

Ajai Ragde, as my fellow classmate Mahesh Jhangiani had commented was, “The first monitor in almost every standard and standing first in class. Also very short haircut.” Francis D’Lima reminded us that Ajai was the Head Boy of our school and Jeremy Thommy added, “Ajai, you were the brains in our batch.” When the eternally humble Ajai objected to the praises on Facebook, Farrokh Jijina put the hammer down with, “Don’t be modest, Ragde. You were THE brains.”

Thanks to THE brains and his interest in Quiz groups, in 2015 Ajai explained to me his reason to LOG IN, “Actually am really not much into all these things. Still use an old Nokia phone, nothing “smart” about it. Even my Facebook page was started very recently, because our local Quiz group puts up their events schedule on FB, else may not have got into it. Anyway, am glad I did. Found Clifton Rodricks, Ajay Dasani, couple of ex-scouts pals, and now finally finding you is like having found the elusive unicorn!!! I really thought I had lost you forever. What yaar Francis, you look so different, so distinguished and greying!!! For a long time I was not sure it is indeed you, until I kept following the school batch posts to confirm it is you, only then dared to make the friend request!!! So happy u have responded. BTW just last week while clearing a cupboard, came across all the old TV Todays and stuff. Really miss all the golden days, when we were carefree and footloose!! Was just telling my kids about it.”

In 1976 and 1977 Ajai & I jointly wrote articles for an up & coming TV magazine called TV Today, edited by Achyut Vaze and we shared the twenty rupees we got for each article. Remember there was no Cable TV, no cell phones and no computers at our disposal. Living on the “other side of the tracks” my family could not afford one of those black, very sturdy, rotary phones that were used to a lot of banging. Ironically, my father was a telephone mechanic at the East India Cotton Exchange, where these phones were the heart of the business. I used the pay phones at Dockyard Road station to get in touch with Ajai or make appointments with our guests. With our scribble pads, Ajai’s command over the English language, my creative writing and knowledge of all the BEST bus routes, we managed to interview well known personalities from various fields on what television “Doordarshan” meant to them. Looking back now, I am amazed how we managed to interview Adi Marzban, Mario Miranda, Alyque Padamse, Busybee (Behram Contractor), Simi Garewal, Ingrid Albuquerque, Roda Mehta & “Pooh” Sayani to name a few. The most hilarious one was Jalal Agha at his 10 by 10 Tardeo office, where he smoked his small Wills and offered us chai and suggested, “And if we can’t get good serials like ‘Here’s Lucy’, we could have ‘Here’s Radha’ or something. Why not? We have the talent!” The interview that we prepared for the most was one of our own school alumnus, the legend of Indian cricket, Sunil Gavaskar. His “Point of View” while we sat in those comfy cane chairs at the Bombay Cricket Association nets was inspiring and gave us a glimpse of the future of cricket on television.

When I mentioned to Ajai that I continued my creative writing in the eighties, interviewing Ajit Wadekar and Hanumant Singh for the State Bank magazine, as a true friend he was happy for me and he reminded me of a common thread in my partnerships in my career. Ajai wrote, “At least one of us has benefited directly from the experiences at TV Today! My own journalistic output since then has only been the odd article in the DMET annual magazines. Remember your editor at State Bank that you introduced me to in the late eighties, Mr. Bailur? His name as like Ragde, is a typical Chitrapur Saraswat surname. The Hattangadi who recruited you into Union Carbide must be Kishor Hattangadi, who is my cousin-brother-in-law, he’s married to Jayvanthi (nee Ragde, my cousin and daughter of Dada’s elder first cousin), see how small the world is! So its two guys from my miniscule community you have worked closely with!”

Ajai is right, I truly owe all my writings and national awards to the Chitrapur Saraswat community and their command over the English language and yes it helps that Konkani is our common mother tongue. Talking about mother tongues, Ajai often visited my home in Mazagon and my family, especially my mother, was so happy that he was the type of guy I was hanging out with. But we were not always the perfect kids, especially in college. Being part of St. Xavier’s Creativity Group, we used our creativity to our advantage. Bunking classes to see movies, play table tennis or carrom or to do an interview for TV Today. For both of us, family was very important and in 2015 when we reconnected and started sharing emails, you could see that Ajai though he did not have pride but of his family he was proud. He rarely posted anything on Facebook but when Devashree won the Wipro Earthian 2018 Sustainability Competition, he shared the post with all of us. To me, it was fascinating to see that Devashree’s project dealt with transportation issues of Mumbai’s iconic BEST buses. I remember commenting, “This is the Circle of Life. Riding the #45 to school, so that we can give our B.E.S.T. to our children. They punch their Ticket to success and we are glad to be part of the Ride. When you are named after the Goddess of Wealth & Prosperity, Devashree’s sustainability at the top of the Double Decker of success and concern for Mother Earth is a forgone conclusion. May the Conductor of our lives continue to guide you all and may Texas be your destination as you pull the bell for your next Stop. Stay Blessed! Ride the Wave Partner!”

Unfortunately, Ajai will not be stopping here in Texas, but I know he will always be within us and continue to inspire us to read more and maybe write a book. To his entire family, especially Deepa, Sanat, Sannidhi and my new friend Devashree, I will not try to understand your loss of Ajai and his mother but promise you of my prayers for strength and guidance. If there is one thing that I am very angry with Ajai for, is that he had promised to make his patent Mutton Do Piaza a la Ragde on my next visit, something he loved cooking for his children. But if any of you are in the Dallas area, we will toast his life as I prepare some Mutton Rogan Josh for the twenty somethings and some traditional vegetarian Goan food for Deepa.

There will be no more reading, writing or riding with Ajai, but I know Ajai loved poetry. As we mourn the loss of our friend Ajai Ragde and know we are blessed that he was part of our journey here is a fitting goodbye. On April 26, 2015, our classmate Farrokh Jijina posted this poem on his timeline:

The Day is Done

By Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

The day is done, and the darkness

Falls from the wings of Night,

As a feather is wafted downward

From an eagle in his flight.

I see the lights of the village

Gleam through the rain and the mist,

And a feeling of sadness comes o'er me

That my soul cannot resist:

A feeling of sadness and longing,

That is not akin to pain,

And resembles sorrow only

As the mist resembles the rain.

Come, read to me some poem,

Some simple and heartfelt lay,

That shall soothe this restless feeling,

And banish the thoughts of day.

Not from the grand old masters,

Not from the bards sublime,

Whose distant footsteps echo

Through the corridors of Time.

For, like strains of martial music,

Their mighty thoughts suggest

Life's endless toil and endeavor;

And to-night I long for rest.

Read from some humbler poet,

Whose songs gushed from his heart,

As showers from the clouds of summer,

Or tears from the eyelids start;

Who, through long days of labor,

And nights devoid of ease,

Still heard in his soul the music

Of wonderful melodies.

Such songs have power to quiet

The restless pulse of care,

And come like the benediction

That follows after prayer.

Then read from the treasured volume

The poem of thy choice,

And lend to the rhyme of the poet

The beauty of thy voice.

And the night shall be filled with music,

And the cares, that infest the day,

Shall fold their tents, like the Arabs,

And as silently steal away.

Lastly, as Charlie Puth & Wiz Khalifa would sing:

It's been a long day without you, my friend/ And I’ll tell you all about it when I see you again/ We’ve come a long way from where we began/ Oh I’ll tell you all about it when I see you again/ When I see you again.

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Reading, Writing and Riding with Ajai

From Fan To Best Friend To Brother!